LeishBlog

Big weekend. The Big Day out last on Friday was rock. I was right with my pre-gig premonitions; there were thousands of tools and you could have mistaken some of the crowd for Cronulla riot revellers. Shoulders shrouded in the Australian flag, no tops, no arses, thongs and most of them were pissed off 2 beers. There were lots of girls (I say girls because they had to be tweenies) in their string bikinis and daisy dukes, sucking face with pimply riot boys, who later in the evening no doubts spent some serious time spewing on the sidelines.  I worked most of Friday and ventured out to Homebush in time to meet up with Flat Mate Mick, my partner in Rock.  We’ve been to quite a few gigs together this year and I can say an advantage of being a gig buddy with him (as well as his natural charm) is that we are similar heights and he gets it when I say,
‘I can’t fucking see anything, I might as well be at home watching this on the telly!’
The first gig we caught was Aussie boys Augie March, who are charming live and my favourite moment of their set was just as they began to play ‘One crowded hour’. The lead singer threatened everyone is a fabulous way, saying that,“We are only going to play the song if you all promise not to fuck off afterwards and stick around for the rest of the set!”Love it. No one moved. Of course Rage against the Machine were an absolute highlight. Flat Mate Mick and I found a great spot to stand on some seats and obscure other peoples view and we could see the stage and the screens. Man they are a tight live band and Tom Morello …..well all I can say that he has nimble fingers, a fabulous guitarist. We danced and sang along punchy the air like anarchic youth. The climax of the gig was of course Killing in the Name and I must say all the hair on my arms stood up as 50,000 people sang (or shouted) along at the end of the song, ‘fuck you I won’t do what you tell me….. It was magic and Mick must have gotten sick of me on the train, going home, shaking my head saying, ‘That was mad….I can’t believe we saw them….they were soooo good,’Besides the music my favourite part of the day was watching vigilante non-ticket holders climbing the fence and scattering like cockroaches, running away from the security guards and the cops. I mean good on them for climbing over spiky fences in such an agile manner, but Mick and I also agreed that I spent a good 14 minutes panicking on the internet trying to get our tickets and if the kids had a good internet connection and their parents credit cards they wouldn’t be getting pepper sprayed and handcuffed. They were amusing though and I loved that the smart people waited for the kids to jump the fence and while they were being caught, they used the distraction and chaos to also jump the fence, now that is thinking. The rest of the weekend was awesome. I hired a car and headed north to Hawks Nest to hang out with the family on the beach, the McTrents, my cousin Claire and her partner Trent and I shared a stunning meal at Tea Gardens classiest restaurant, Tillermans, and they laughed and reeled in horror at the stories of my latest boy exploits and my writing plans. Trent doesn’t appear to be surprised at most things that I do, he sits and shakes his head and I love that Claire’s eyes become wide and she usually says things like, ‘Oh Aleisha…..no! Oh My god…..you didn’t’              She is gorgeous.Sunday we hit the road or the bush really, with our bikes and completed a 14 km bush/bash cycle which has damaged my arse in a permanent way. It was satisfying and I kept up with everyone, which was surprising because I haven’t ridden a bike in ages (except for the gym, but that doesn’t count!). We had an Aussie bbq with the family on Sunday night and then I tried to have an early to bed evening because I was due back at work on Monday morning and had to get up when it was still dark.This week has been pretty mad work wise, with our first show for Out of the Question, going to air tonight (Thursday!) It’s been fun, heading down to Melbourne to shoot the show, but also a bit exhausting. I am still a little dumbfounded with the idea that I am involved in a show that is hosted by Glenn Robbins. He is truly a dude and I have great vibes about the programs success. As a team I think we really enjoy each others company and that is the best feeling because it comes across in the show. I am going to say here that I believe Tony Moclair, one of the panel members is totally the next big thing, he is a crack up and when he complimented one of my jokes last night I was extremely flattered because I think he is the comedy bomb. Respect to the Moclair. At the studio record I had the scary job of scoring. I sat there with my big black texta and cue cards, horrified that I was going to get it wrong. Luckily I think I did alright so I have a reprieve until next week.I love Melbourne and I sort of wish I lived there. We stay in a great boutique hotel in St Kilda which is V handy for after show drinks. The worst part about yesterday was that I had a shocking migraine throughout the day and felt a bit hopeless having to go to the Channel 7 sick bay to sleep, while everyone else was running around doing important show things.  Anyway enough with all of that. It is a bit bizarre to think that tomorrow we will go to work and start writing next weeks show and before we know it we will be on the plane, heading back to Melbourne to do it all over again. It is an absolute pleasure to do my job and I am a lucky lady. I can’t wait for the weekend. It is social city, catching up with friends on Friday, a pool party with Justin at a ritzy joint he is looking after on Saturday followed by the much promised ‘Aleisha’s first pay cheque so I am going to shout dinner for Nicole’ and then followed by cocktails at the Lost for Flat Mate Sarah’s birthday. Blogarama.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, my trip to Japan in December really opened my eyes to the fact that we in Australia are selfish miserable commuters. We don’t care about order and manners, we push, we shove, we have to get on the train first because we are more important than anyone else and us getting where we have to be takes priority. In Japan everyone lines up on the platform and when the train arrives, they politely step to either side of the door and allow the passengers to get off and then they step on. Not hard, a panda could figure that one out, but still here in Sydney, people ram raid their way through waiting passengers so their feet can be the first to step aboard. No difference if you are 1^st or 5^th really.

This morning a psychotic woman sighed, when I took more than a millisecond to retrieve coinage from my purse when paying for my ticket. I’m glad I am not her, living in her impatient sad ‘I sigh at stupid things’ body. I’m guessing someone hasn’t had a shag in a while?

Then we all stand in the train. Today I had the mortifying experience of being positioned right next to backpack scrunchy woman, who insisted on squeezing into our carriage, but didn’t think to remove the offending bag and proceeded to bump and grind everyone in a 5 meter radius with it. My train brain mantra went something like this….

“Scrunchys are sooooo over. Buy some hair bands, what are you carrying in that bag anyway? Take it off your back. TAKE IT OFF! JUST TAKE IT OFF! If that bag touches me one more time… Aleisha, breath… look at someone else…you are going mental over a woman in a scrunchy and a backpack….get a grip…look that man has a rats tail focus on him……it’s not worth it!…I can’t do it, I’m drawn back to the idiot with the backpack….I’ll bet she is going to push her way off this train….yep she ain’t waiting for anyone, What a fucking moron. Now not only has she whacked me with the backpack, she has gotten me all pre work shitty. I hate her and her fucking backpack!,”

I seethed like that for 4 stops.

I was right, Backpack scrunchy moron pushed her way through the crowd and then proceeded to commit one of the worst commuting crimes ever….the slow walk. Tell me, why do people push and shove and then slow down as if they have been shot by a slow motion ray gun? What is their deal? I wanted to drag Backpack scrunchy moron off the stairs and through her onto the train tracks and watch her struggle like an overturned bug on its back, incapable of flipping itself over. How much do you want to bet she will be on my train tomorrow?

Moving on, before I have a stroke. I must make note that Soph and Dan were defeated 4-10 today by team Tim/Aleisha in foosball. We are the champions and I managed to keep my swearing to a quiet roar and I think I have improved a bit as well, manoeuvring the ball, like my heart has been played with this year…..softly but with a bitter twist. Oh ouch, personal metaphor! (and a cheap one at that!)

Tonight Justin and I went to the flicks. We caught the wonderful Juno, a must see on all accounts. I love that Juno was written by a blogger, Diablo Cody. She is wicked and her fame exploded with her Blog (and subsequent book), The Pussy Ranch, all about her year of stripping and writing about it. Maybe the key to the success of LeishBlog is me getting my norgs out and writing about it. Wait, I’ve already done that and no one seems that interested. Anyway, I must rest.

So no blog for the past week because really I haven’t done much. Working, sleeping, writing and attempting to get back into some sort of exercise routine to prevent fat from attaching itself to my arse due to the lack of movement in the day. I have been having fun with my job. Basically I am writing questions for the program, so I spend a lot of time reading newspapers and surfing the net, a job that is perfect for an Internet junkie such as myself.The office is pretty fun, we take regular breaks and one of our relaxation techniques is playing foosball and yelling at each other. We have a bit of a team rotation thing going. You wouldn’t think knocking that stupid little white ball into the goals would be that hard, but trust me it is and with the excitement it can get pretty noisy. Today Lucy discreetly said to us after Soph called us ‘homos’ for getting a goal and me saying something office appropriate like, “Just because you couldn’t fucking take it” that Channel 10 executive people were in a nearby office looking at material Bondi Rescue (which our company also makes). Without thinking I said,“It doesn’t matter what they think of us, our show is on channel 7!”Yeah I didn’t really mean that of course and we turned down the volume a bit.Flat Mate Sarah, who is sitting down the hall from me, editing Bondi Rescue said on Friday night she had a laugh when she could hear me telling stories to our boss. In fact, I was recounting this story. Inappropriate? No!Sarah said my voice and laugh (which I admit can be avidly loud at times) was quiet clear down the other end of the building. She laughed as she told Mick on Friday night,“Home Leish is just the same as work Leish, no difference there! I could hear Leish talking about seeing people shagging in a window…. This is to Michael, one of the heads of the company…..very Leish,”I’m glad she said that because rarely do I act differently in a work situation. Actually the only time I change is around boys and that has to stop because I think the persona that sometimes appears around guys I am interested in, is a curse and it isn’t the real me. So there.On Thursday we farewelled UK Cat, back to England she popped. We went to the Oaks, in Neautral Bay and I continued my seafood discovery (having never eaten seafood in my 26 years before 2 months ago) by trying a mussel. The Oaks is famous for it mussels and I must say for a squirmy looking goo thing, it didn’t taste fishy and I think I probably could eat a bunch of them without heaving. Today I also had sushi for lunch and actually ate real fish sushi rather than ordering vego stuff like I always do, Praise the lord I just may be normal! (Questionable).The weekend was unusual in the way that the Maccas all had a weekend at home. On Friday night we watched Blood Diamond, with a South African accented Leonardo DiCaprio. The film was pretty good and certainly made me feel that I would push my next fiancée into buying a politically correct, no person was murdered in the making of this, diamond ring.Saturday I ventured into the city to pick up our copy of the Andrew Morton, Tom Cruise Biography, which I read over 2 days. I love trash biographies, particularly when they are controversial, you can’t buy it in Australia and everyone in the book is whacked. After reading it I can agree with reviewers who have said that the book is fairly non committal with evidence but it does tend to side with the fact that Katie Holmes has turned into a femmebot and Scientology errs on the side of cookoo. Sure there are a couple of defamatory things in the book, but it makes me really wonder the power the Scientologists have in stopping the book being sold here. I bought the book from the wonderful Japanese bookshop Kinokuniya, arguably my favourite bookshop in Sydney and always has books that are hard to get….go the Japanese! They’re not scared of little Tom Cruise!Saturday afternoon, like an addict that had fallen off the wagon, I went to Myer. For three long weeks I have avoided the sales and spending money but now that the salaryless drought is near end I thought a little look wouldn’t hurt anyone. Turns out it didn’t hurt anyone except my credit card. I was pretty good and I was there for a reason. I am looking for a dress to wear to my friend Hayley’s wedding that is taking place in a couple of weeks, but I got stuck in the Cue section and ended up trying on a million things that were nothing to do with wedding attire. In the end I bought jeans and couple of shirts and have still yet to find a dress (Shame I might have to return next weekend!).The big day out is looming and I know I will complain and whinge like I do in most crowd situations (I hate people really, especially in swarms) but I am going to see Rage against the Machine and Silverchair……and to be mauled by the youth of Australia, trodden on, observe slutty teenagers getting their tits out, pilling off their nuts and all of the other things that come with music festivals. Shit I sound like a Grandma, but I have always been that way. I love live music; I just dislike with a passion most people that attend concerts.Speaking of concerts I had a bit of an ebay bidding war on Friday night for tickets to see Feist….you know the chick from the ipod advertisement 1, 2, 3, 4 tell me that you love me more……of course she is a talented musician and the gig is going to be well wicked. The Hawk, Joel and Princess Nicole are going as well so much excitement is to be had.
Ok then,
L

So I am back in full work mode, back to the 10 hour days and I bloody love it. Suppose I can talk about my mighty job now….I am writing and researching for Glenn Robbins new show ‘Out of the Question’. It is a massive thrill and I am not going to say much about it besides the fact that it is going to kick arse ( I am perhaps a wee bit biased but trust me it is going to be great.) Channel 7 are showing some fantastic promos featuring Glenn that still make me laugh out loud. Glenn is a dude and I feel quite honoured to be in his presence, actually that’s sort of how I feel about everyone at Jigsaw Entertainment, they are such a great bunch of people and it is a chilled out yet productive office.
One of the nicest parts of the gig is that Flat Mate Sarah is also working in the same office, editing Bondi Rescue so we have been catching the train, joining the other Sydney commuters and leaving the office together at 7 or so and getting home ready for sleepy times. TV is the sort of industry that doesn’t have set hours, you work until you are done, everyone does it and it can have the capacity to take over your life, which is fine for me cause I ain’t got nothing better to do and this gig is worth it!This morning, having yesterday consumed 3 wagon wheels and sitting on my arse all day, I decided to turn my morning walk into a jog and nearly expired. I thought I would try and beat my subconscious, which believes I cannot run, by forcing myself to jog my usual route. I did it, but got home sweating profusely and breathing as if I had a three pocket a day habit. Christ I was exhausted and it was only 7am. After a cold shower, normally reserved for psychopaths, I finally started to cool down, only to be faced with the uncomfortable dilemma of having to use the hairdryer. I succumbed because I am still in the ‘look nice for work’ routine (which actually I always try to do) so I reheated again. Nice.
I am already in a bit of a routine. Get up 6.30, exercise, go to work, 8.30 finish work 7, eat and write, sleep.
When we are in production I suppose it will change a bit because we are all travelling each week so there’s that added bit. As well as writing blogs and trying to finish my book I am also writing stand up, which I hoping fairly regularly in the next month or so (give or take a couple of work commitments). There was even talk around the office today about me doing audience warm ups before the shows taping, but it depends on how much they need me for script changes during the night, so it is yet to be decided.
Things are moving well for me and it is sort of ironic that this time last year, I had moved to Sydney, wanting to be completely consumed by a job and a year later I am finally here. Funny how it all works.  
At the moment there is a bit of a voluntary no drinking in the week going on at the house, which I am happy to participate in because I am almost too tired to drink at night and I can’t afford it until I get paid……oh sweet pay day mammas going to buy some shoes….and some jeans…and some sunnies!! I will however break our no drinking agreement to farewell UK Cat on Thursday night, who is heading back to dreary wintry London instead of staying here with us to enjoy the rest of the summer! But she has promised to return so I am holding her to it!Looking forward to the next couple of weeks with a weekend with the family for Australia day coming up and also the Big Day Out with Mick: Rage Against the Machine……fuck Yes. I am going to bed now to lie there and have grim thoughts about my run tomorrow.  

If you are interested in being in the audience for Glenn Robbins new show visit Out of the Question

This last week, I have rested and recuperated (from my holiday) up at Hawks Nest at Port Stevens in New South Wales. I took UK Cat on a bit of a road trip; we hired a car and headed north. As I have said on a number of occasions, I love driving and I miss having a car.  As soon as I get in the drivers seat I get all angsty and road ragey. I get ready to overtake like a mo fo and develop an instinctual distaste for anyone I believe has attitude or who I think that they think that they are better than me or cuts in on me. UK Cat witnessed this a lot over the past week and I have to say big up to her for sitting next to me and staying sane. Sometimes I would look over and she would be cringing and laughing at my medium level of road madness.  Nick the ex used to always ask ‘Why are you so annoyed with everyone else on the road?’ I think it is my Dad, who instilled in me the ‘I’m not worried about you as a driver, but it’s all of the other bloody idiots on the road that I am concerned about’ This is apparently is a required parental speech.My Dad still white knuckles when he is in a car when I am driving and he has only let me drive his precious Honda Prelude a grand total of twice because of ‘insurance’ reasons. He just remembers me as a learner driver slamming on the breaks when I got scared while merging. I pulled over and we had a massive argument and from then on Dad paid for me to have proper driving lessons so there was no risk of me damaging his car. Bless.I digress. UK Cat, living in London hadn’t driven for 4 years and had never driven an automatic. I said,
‘Babe, you’ll be fine. Just press that peddle for go and that one for stop’.
Of course I forgot to tell her that you only use one foot and poor UK Cat freaked out using both feet, which of course is a big driving no no. After a mid intersection driver change I realised that I hadn’t told her about the one foot thing and later in the afternoon, she was brave, got back in the driver seat and soon became very proficient and luckily anger free automatic driver ‘go UK Cat!’.We had a great week, staying in my Aunty and Uncles place, sitting on the beach, reading and I wrote about 7 thousand words which is the most that I have put down in awhile. I really used the week to get my shit together, both emotionally and work wise. There is a lot of stuff I have let go of recently and I know there are going to be some massive changes for the better for me in the next couple of months so this was a cathartic way to conclude my holiday.  We returned to Sydney in time for a lovely a glamorous dinner with the girls at North Bondi Italian, right at the end of Bondi beach. It’s a bar full of beautiful people, so I got the cleavage out and pretended that I fitted in…..it sorted of worked and we had a excellent evening.

Over this last year I truly come to appreciate my girlfriends and I don’t want to get all Carrie Bradshaw on you all but shit man, the chicks that I hang with are such resilient and caring people and I don’t know what I would do without them. Princess Nicole is a member of friendship royalty and we think she should have her own advice column on LeishBlog (suggestions?).              
                          
Today I helped Rowan the Hawk, Joel K.B, and the Bovino brothers, Luke and Adam (they sound like gangsters) shoot a comedy sketch in north Sydney. On the weekends north Sydney is pretty quiet as it is largely a business district.  The sketch was pretty good, and involved a game show where you have to get away from a sniper for 100 bucks. I was the host. Everything worked really well, it looked good, we all got our bits right and then on the way back to the car I noticed some cops approaching us. I didn’t think much of it as we were really close to the Cop Shop but they seemed pretty focused on us. I suppose The Hawk carrying a pretty realistic looking pump action shot gun replica got their attention. In the distance there were lots of sirens and I started to get a bit of a sick feeling going on in my guts, that perhaps the sirens were for us and we might be a little bit in trouble. Two chick cops approached us (one was apparently dead sexy and the guys all wanted to be arrested and probed by her in a private room at the station) but I was thinking about my time at film school and how many times we were told that whenever we were dealing with guns, real or fake, we had to tell the cops and preferably get an armourer to be on set. As this was a shoot and run (ha!) sort of deal we just picked a location and shot it, real fast. While the chick cops were questioning us….actually Joel K.B and I sat away from the action and the cops focused on questioning The Hawk, a big fat man cop turned up in his cop car with the light flashing and the sirens blaring….a little bit over done if you ask me but what ever floats your boat, especially considering that he knew it wasn’t a proper shoot em up situation because the chick cops had radioed ahead. He got out of the car, acting all mannish, clutching his gun, blah blah.He then proceeded to lecture The Hawk and us about what to do when we have fake guns and that our gun looked too real and if Rowan had looked dodgy he would have  had no hesitation in ‘blowing him away!’ nice responsible cop talk. The Hawk noted later in the afternoon that perhaps he had done some time in the Victorian Police force with that attitude!I realise they were only doing their jobs and apparently a granny had called the cops, apparently ignoring the fact that as well as The Hawk, we were all standing around with camera gears and mics and stuff. It was a bizarre experience and I noted to Joel K.B that I wasn’t dressed for jail and it wasn’t fair that I didn’t have any hot cop eye candy to flirt with like them.Afterwards, all the boys could talk about is how much they all wanted to bone the ‘indy cop’ which was suddenly the hot cops new name because she was wearing black framed glasses (actually Luke Bovino wasn’t that into her, so kudos to you Luke!).  
The Hawk and Joel K.B later mused about what ‘indy cop’ did in her spare time. It was decided that she sits in her underwear writing Indy love songs while eating cream cheese. Too much time on your hands boys.
After our brush with the law we headed to the cinema to finally see Wes Andersons, The Darjeeling Limited. A film I have been trying to see since Boxing Day. I would like to live in Wes Anderson’s world; colourful, beautiful music, emotive, and occupied by fascinating characters. I also adore Jason Shwartzman, and even though I am currently maternally void, I would be quite happy to mother his child, or at least shag him.  Maybe an overstatement but he is hunky in a mega way! Well this brings me to the end of my summer holiday. Tomorrow is the beginning of a new adventure at my new job. It will be weird getting back into a routine that doesn’t involve an afternoon sleep….maybe I could work that into my contract?Anyway I shall report as I see fit. L

In the past 24 hours I have been exposed to two extremes of the entertainment spectrum. Yesterday Justin and I ventured to the cinema to see the much anticipated Coen Brothers film, No Country for Old Men. 

A couple of people have recommended this movie to me and when I asked why, they all replied, because its good, just go and see it, you’ll get it.

I am not a film reviewer but I can say that it was the sort of film that you don’t want to talk about when you leave. It is hauntingly beautiful, complex and entertaining. Everything you would expect from those two and more.  I wanted to savour the feeling as I left the cinema, because I haven’t felt it in a while. We so often consume cinema without a soul under the guise of entertainment I think we forget how good watching a truly outstanding can be. I didn’t fidget, look out for jump cuts and boom dips, look at my watch or question shonky plot lines, I was totally emersed in the film.  Now don’t think I am a cinematic prude, I enjoy mass produced comedies as much as the next bogan, but when you see a film, such as No Country for Old Men, it makes you wonder why there more aren’t produced of that calibre. It’s not like we don’t have access to imaginative stories and there are so many clever film makers out there….I went to film school with a bunch of people that are motivated and ready to produce some great stuff and I know the answer is obvious; quality for some reason, doesn’t make as much cash at the box office. I find it strange that people choose not to watch films that move you and challenge you as a viewer That’s what cinema is about. I want to walk out of a film feeling different, having learnt something about characters and visited another world.  A couple of months ago I had the pleasure of watching As it is in Heaven.

A film about a conductor whose life aspiration is to create music that will open people’s hearts, the onl prblem is, is his heart is about to pack it in. He retires indefinitely to Norrland in the far north of Sweden, to the village of his childhood, where he  attempts to restart his life and his hear and help the people of the village get it together again.The film has had a massiveword-of-mouth success and has been playing at the Hayden Orpheum in Cremorne (SYD) for a record-breaking 56 weeks and is now the longest running film in Australia. It is another really beautiful film, that if you can see I would highly recommned, because ithe joy of it stayed with me for days.  Jesus get me off my high horse, I have saddle rash and I haven’t even started with the second part of my rant.    Here goes…The other half of my weekend was spent tonight watching a taping of the new series of  Gladiators. The Hawk, Princess Nicole and UK Cat where heading along and they had an extra ticket so I surrendered to my absolute dislike of the old series and headed along to scope it all out. I must say the production is absolutely massive and the crew really did a fabulous job getting it all together. It is a huge space and the set changes are pretty involved but they kept it going ok and the audience seemed to be amused by it all. As I said, when Gladiators was on in the past it was never my cup of tea, was Mike Whitney in it? Who can say!I will say that that the Gladiators themselves appear to be subhuman. Their dialogue made me laugh because it was so fake nasty and as usual, not a single ounce of fat could be found on any of their beefy bodies. It is as they said ‘Spectacle tv’ and I am sure it will probably rate its arse off but I felt that while siting their watching fit people in spandex manoeuvring past obstacles, a small piece of my brain shrivelled up.   I sat there deep in thought about something self indulgent and Princess Nicole looked over at me and said“Babe, if this was made by the ABC you’d be all over it!” She’s probably right, but I can’t imagine Andrew Denton and Tony Jones in Spandex…actually I can and it disturbs me. The Hawk asked us if we thought the douche bag Gladiators were attractive to us ladies. I said they made me feel nauseous, all of that tan and the muscles. I mean well done to them for spending a lot of their lives doing sit ups and avoiding any form of fun, such as eating junky food and drinking heavily but they those sort of dudes just aren’t’ for me. The Hawk:
What sort of guy do you like then? 

LeishBlog:
Umm…One with a brain. Probably a geek boy, a bit skinny and pale….you know, someone who has read a book. 

The Hawk:
Imagine you’re Gladiator…….’The Educator’….he like books, wears glasses and has skin that has never seen the sun……  Yep, that’s my man! Anyway it was a fun night. A great experience seeing how organised their shoot night was, very impressive on an organisation scale.  
Tomorrow UK Cat and I are going on a road trip. Everyone else is going back to work so we are hiring a car and heading up the coast to my favourite spot in NSW, Hawks Nest. I think she is going to love it and all of the pretty boys that holiday there! I am looking forward to writing, reading and finishing off my new stand up bit that I can feel brewing in my brain but needs an afternoon of staring at a computer screen and talking to myself to get done. Can’t think of anywhere better to do it than Hawkies. 

Yesterday was a magic day full of moments that I will store happily as the highlight so far of my summer break. There are often experiences that we live through, that we don’t realise at the time, how wonderful they are until you lie in bed relieving them or weeks later while sitting in an office, you dream about stepping back into that moment. Yesterday I was fully aware that I was going to look back at the day with longing and a smile.

So what did I do?

Princess Nicole has a friend Brett, who will now be known as the Captain, who somehow has access to one of the most kick arse bourgeois motor boats in Sydney (actually there are a lot of these boats but for dramatic effect lets say that!). I grew up on boats, I love to water-ski and go fast, but never have I been on a boat such as this.

In the morning, The Princess, UK Cat and I went shopping for Prawns and dip and I pondered if there would be anyway to store them…..

LeishBlog:

Should we get ice?

Princess N:

No babe, it has a fridge…

LeishBlog:

Oh

So we caught a long bus for a long ride up to the northern beaches, to Pittwater where the boat was docked.

LeishBlog:

What about toilets? You know if we are on the boat all day…

Princess N:

Babe, it’s got one of those too!

LeishBlog:

Oh

We arrive and The Captain proudly shows us on board, where UK Cat and I totally lose our cool ‘we often have days like this status’ and become kids hopping around the boat looking at all of the fancy features…..

“Oh my god, it does have a toilet….just like on the plane!

“It has a sink!”

“Look the fancy leather seats, they recline into sun beds!”

Nicole and The Captain preparing to board

Cat and I…Can’t believe our luck!

Finding the perfect spot!

Yeah, Like we own the boat

Princess N, swans around the boat like she has grown up on it and then reveals she has brought a bottle of Verve Clicquot Champagne for us to drink, which she had been saving for a year. Splendid.

We take off, wind in our hair, stopping briefly to pick up The Captains mate Muz, and then head across a big stretch of bumpy fun water until we found a little private beach where it seems only rich people or faux wealthy such as us, can drop anchor. UK Cat and I very quickly found our places on the sun beds, drinks in hand, giggling with absolute delight every time The Captain steered us over large waves. We shared a lovely moment when nothing was said, but we shook our heads and laughed, amazed that we were there.

Nicole and Muz take the plunge

Later in the day UK Cat talked about the British elite and how they never invite the proletariat to join their world, so experiences like this were nearly impossible to have. Shit, I live in Sydney and I rarely have these sort of days……but when I do, I am happy to temporarily slip out of my world, living in a share house, catching the train, eating Oporto into a world where I am a boat wife (as we labelled my fantasy rich girl persona), sunning myself on the deck, swimming and neatly presenting the dips and chips, topping up peoples champagne and then going back to improving my tan.

Nicole popping the Verve darling

The ladies before I was peer pressured to Jump in and mid jump!

End of the day

About 2 hours in I had become ensconced in my new way of life, declaring that;

“I could never go back now…..it isn’t fair to allow someone to live like this, then thrust them back into normal society,”

UK Cat agreed.

After jumping off the boat and a quick swim to shore we headed back to open the bubbly and eat the prawns. I must say drinking well posh champagne is a treat and makes you realise how god-awful drinking mediocre bubbly can be (which I shall be doing now, so I will have to deal with it!)

“Remember gentlemen, it’s not just France we are fighting for, it’s Champagne!”

~ Sir Winston Churchill, 1918

Too right Churchill!

Post lunch, with full bellies, we lazed around some more and then headed to another spot further around the bay for some more swimming.

It wasn’t just the boat and the faux wealth that allowed us to have such a fantastic day, it was the high quality company and we laughed and laughed and laughed. We treated the day as it would never end and when it did, we sat around at the Newport Arms reliving it, watching the sunset and drinking much more appropriately priced alcohol.

I asked The Captain,

“How can we make this happen everyday?…..I mean do you think people do live like this? Just motoring around, eating and drinking? Because you see them out on the water everyday on the Harbour….This must be their life?”

He didn’t need to answer my ponderings because I did it for him,

“I suppose it is money and a shit load of it….but are they happy I mean really happy with their lives?”

Cat, Princess N and The Captain, looked at me as if I were dense!

Princess N:

YES!………Are you kidding? Drinking Verve on a boat worth more than your house, of course they are bloody happy!

She’s right. They probably are really happy, not having to think about paying the credit card bill and how they are going to find the rent money when they bought shoes instead.

On the way home in the car, it dawned on me that I really didn’t know who owned the boat. The Captain said his ‘friends’ I questioned and pushed him, not really wanting to know, liking the mystery but enjoying the challenge of trying to break him for a name. Why the hell I hadn’t really asked the question earlier in the day I don’t know. I was probably having too much fun! I don’t think I care.

For a couple of moments yesterday while we recoiled over the waves, the summer heat lulling me into day sleep, I was content.

I temporarily misplaced the despondency that so often attacks me and the apprehension and worry that I will never be fully satisfied with my life until I am in love and I have the best job ever and I am financially secure.

I thought about the advice that I had given Adam, in Hobart a month ago. We were talking about tomorrow…..how everything will be better tomorrow, relationships, career, your heart. How you can convince yourself, if you stick in a situation long enough things will get better. You tell yourself, they have to.

I don’t believe that anymore.

I asked him that if things aren’t better tomorrow, what do you do? Do sit around thinking and acting like that for the next 5 years? Or do you take a risk; do something different, with the idea that you can change the monotony of the tomorrow scenario?

I am going to take my own advice and make some changes. I might not be on a fancy boat anymore but I don’t want to loose that ‘now’ feeling. I enjoyed being content. I had forgotten how good, not worrying and carrying shit with me felt. I wrote a blog a couple of days ago that was all about momentary happiness, about passion, lust and that for me the possibility of gaining happiness by doing brash and spontaneous things is worth the risk of it all falling apart.

On the bus yesterday Princess N said to me,

“Babe, you are about to stat this great job…..enjoy it. It’s massive. It’s what you want isn’t it? Things will happen for you, just sit back and let people come to you. Stop trying so hard. Stop wanting love and all of that shit so much and then it will come to you, trust me,”

And I do.

Today Positive Simone and I headed to Bondi Junction, pretentious shopping centre of the year recipient, to lunch and peruse shops that you have to show your credit card, just to get in. Oh, who has a dose of the bitters?

It was lovely catching up with Simone and she came ready to deal with broken hearted Leish, but instead got a semi positive Leish tinged with a bit of post New Year downer/beginning of New Year panic.

Today I made a couple of purchases. I visited Borders, a multi national company that really helped me out this year. I had a bit of a routine going, when I didn’t have anything to do, I would walk across the Harbour Bridge, eat Oporto and then read magazines and books in Borders. It sounds a bit silly, but I like that they encourage their customers to read for free and they don’t come and snatch the book off you and tell you to get out when you have sat around for 3 hours. Anyway I purchased 2 books. One is a gift and I shall not say what it is, in case of spoiling it, but it is a book that has inspired me and made me laugh until I cried. The other purchase was something for me, the next book in the Aleisha summer of reading range:

Love in the time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez, a highly recommended read and I am told it is full of every kind of love you can imagine. It sounds wonderful and I am looking forward to being moved and challenged. I think I have been far too slack this year in my reading habits. I love reading and I spend a lot of time writing, but really as a writer I think I have ignored the growth that can be made from absorbing other literary influences. I will try harder and it’s not like it’s a demanding thing to get away from my computer screen and sit and read.  I do have the problem though, reading in bed were I constantly fall asleep still holing the book and three hours later I wake up, my arms rigid, from clutching the book.  I have this unconscious determination to, even in sleep, hold the book upright. Weirdo.

After temporarily loosing Positive Simone, who I discovered in the fashion section of the book shop, we headed to Harvey Norman to find me a printer. I figure if I am going to be officially labelled a writer now. I must own some sort of device to print from. I must admit I have been able to get away with a lot of printing at workplaces for the whole year but now I bit the bullet, spent the 70 bucks and even got one with a scanner and a copier so I can make serial killer style copies of my own face….I mean what else are you going to do with it?

A couple of years ago I was working at a temp job and at the time I was nearing completion of my first novel. I was absolutely obsessed with it and during lulls in my work I would discreetly edit and rewrite. It was pretty good because I was typing madly and I suppose it really looked like I was getting into my job so no one questioned what I was doing. I got away with it also because of my super fast alt tabbing skills, removing the evidence straight away. I also became pretty sneaky in the area of printing out the book for editing, section by section so everyone would think I was just printing out work stuff. One day I printed the entire book, about 350 pages in sections of 20 pages. It was hard carrying my bag out without making it look heavy from carrying it all.

I updated my internet security today, renewed the program and somehow my trusty ‘I don’t have to do anything while the software eats the Trojan viruses’ has now installed some bodgy parental control program that asks me for a password every time I look at a page that is slightly risqué. I mean, of course I sit on porn sites most of the time so the password thing is going to get a bit tiring. Actually being a total girl I was trying to download the new Sex and the City movie trailer and the stupid thing thought I was looking at porn. I am going to have to throw my computer away because it is really annoying  anyway why have these stupid programs? I believe children should be able to explore the internet freely anyway….it might help to expand their tiny, sponge like pea brains!!??

Tonight Flat Mate Mick returned home from his holidays just in time to watch 30 Rock with me. We have had this problem with our TV aerial and set top box were just when the show you want to come on is about to start the picture starts to drop out. It is super frustrating but tonight we were prepared, we tuned it in, sat down and A touch of Frost was ending. The picture was pristine. Of course as soon as the 30 Rock credits started   the thing conked and the only way we could get a picture was for one of us to stand next to the tv with our hands over our head like we were being held up. Seriously. Mick  and I both took turns perching on the coffee able, leaning on the tv cabinet, anything to keep the picture. We also decided my rings might generate the signal, so Mick wore those as well.  We have vowed to contact the real estate agent to get our antenna fixed so for once we can sit on the couch and enjoy a show without the exercise routine and balancing act.

Mick the Human TV Antenna

Take a guess where I am going tomorrow? Yeah, not work like most people. I am going to the Zoo, with Princess Nicole and Kat. I don’t know how I feel about zoos. I think they are bad. But I know Taronga do a lot of work to help animals. Perhaps I will decide in an objective way by going to the Zoo and then having something vaguely interesting to write about tomorrow night. The Zoo is followed by a harbour cruise on a friend’s boat on Friday. Ah the life darlings, the life.

Now I must go and read my book and get enthusiastic about love and that.

I do believe New Years Eve is the most overrated party nights of the year. I mean no offence to anyone I have ever spent New Years with, but really we hype this night up to be this uber celebration but by the end of it, it always is a bit of a let down and we end up saying things like,

“Next year we are going to hire a yacht, it will be better”

“Next year we aren’t going to sit near the bushes that have been deemed a urinal,”

“Next year I am going to have someone to pash,”

or we envy other party goers

“They have better cheese than us…why did no one think to get crumbly cheddar? My night is fucking ruined!”

NYE Leish

New Years was a bit of an epic for my peeps this year and surprisingly not in an alcoholic sort of way. It had been deemed that we were going to attempt the near impossible in Sydney…to find a good vantage point to watch the New Years Eve ‘let’s waste our taxpayers money/Aleisha is bitter’ fireworks!’ Princess Nicole had scoped out an excellent area at Cremorne point with lovely views of the Opera house and also the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The funny thing is, everyone else on the leafy North Shore also decided that they wanted to sit there, so part of the deal is, you have to bag your spot in the morning. Cat, Princess Nicole’s lovely friend who is here from the motherland (UK for those un-colonial) for a holiday kindly offered to start sitting on our picnic rug at 11am. She read her book….twice and we ran around trying to get food ready and find domestic things like paper plates, stuff your parents would probably have but we don’t think like them so it is harder. I cooked Lasagne and purchased a lovely selection of dips and chips.

           
                                              Pre-messy crowd              
                             
        Might have been a good shot if I learn to use a camera at night!

‘The Spot’ as we called it was a bit of a hike From Princess Nicole’s house and they shut the road off quite early on, so   clever Nicole used a wheely suitcase to move all of our stuff to pur area. Once we got there we had a lot of time to kill. Everyone bar Justin, had been out celebrating Princess Nicole’s birthday the night before and our alcohol intake had been rather high, even for our standards so none of us surprisingly were in for a big night. This was a good thing because the North Sydney Council had put a lot of thought into the even, hiring 6 port-a-loos for the 28,000 people attending. Nice one. They ‘filled up’ we were informed by some cops, by 7pm and ‘a guy with a truck was coming to pump them empty, but not till later’. This was the only real push I needed to not write myself off, because even slaughtered I was not going to piss publicly. The lines were insane and I would take a wild guess in saying it was an hour wait minimum, which sucked. While waiting in line for the can, I overheard a pommy dude trying to give advice to a mother who had a kid.

Pommy Dude:

Listen just join that line, really there is only about 5 people….

Mum:

(Looking him up and down)

Thanks but we are fine where we are

Pommy Dude:

Suit yourself

LeishBlog:

Sorry, where are these magic toilets?

Pommy Dude:

Yeah like, it is the bloke’s toilets, there’s a cubicle and no one has caught on.

Before he had even finished talking I was dragging Justin with me to stand in the line, and the Pommy Dude was right. We rorted the system and wee in an out within 5 minutes, thus avoiding the skanky toilets that million people had used and as a bonus there was even toilet paper. Hey, now I know we are talking about toilets here, but there is no better feeling than looking at a crown and then cutting in front of everyone because you know something they don’t. That last sentence really makes me look like an arsehole. Anyway for the rest of the night, no one caught on and we had access to our private bathroom. The only  annoyance is that we had to head through as Nicole put it ’skanky town’ the dodgy backpacker end of the park where kids were  everyone was loose and easy and may or may not murder you if you didn’t high five them when they requested. Seriously we did pick he good end because by 12 o’clock the other end was carnage and looked like a post apocalyptic battle scene or something from a zombie flick. Eeiiiiiwww.

I can say the company I keep is pretty top class and we had lots of laughs. We did the whole resolutions thing; I creatively came up with ‘drink more water!’ which was enthralling, but then when I got looks of horror I added ‘to fall in love’ (which isn’t really a resolution) and to have ‘45 minutes of stand up comedy by next December’. Heads nodded, I was given a reprieve. 

         Me contemplating ‘drinking more water’. Justin not impresed.

Joel K.B and Rowan The Hawk, smoked cigars at midnight and when I took Joels he tried to lecture me about not inhaling. I told him I am a lady of class, smoked the cigar and pretended to be Elaine from Seinfeld by saying

‘It’s a peach Jerry!! A Peach’

I then created a new, New Years Resolution, to spend next New Years with someone who would get that joke! He has to be out there someone. I don’t want much. Actually he has to like Seinfeld or want to like it, ski (or snowboard but they have a bad reputation!!!) and like to eat and drink. Really that’s were I am at now.

We watched the fireworks, even though there was a huge tree partially blocking the big bangs and then like the other 28,000 people packed up all our stuff and started the big trek up the hill again. I did have a fun night. I felt a little down but you know think that hopefully is the year that was leaving me.

Today Nicole, Cat and I headed up to the glorious Palm Beach to lie around. I really felt inclines to swim in the ocean today. We found a spot amongst the masses and even though it was choppy, rough and cold, I swam and it felt so cathartic and wonderful. I can see why the Tennis Bogans Beck and Lleyton live up there. I read on the beach, a wonderful novel was a Christmas gift, Memories of my Melancholy Whores, by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. It is a beautiful book and it left me feeling that life has infinite possibilities and that can’t be a bad way to feel on New Years Day.

Last of all. Todays lesson……

Don’t take photos of fireworks, it looks shit. Maybe just watch them??!!